Can’t change a person
Hey Friends,
I’m trying to concentrate and understand how the induction motor runs and how do you apply Fleming’s right-hand rule but I’m just not able to focus. Oh, people be like — Yes, it’s because you are into writing this article that no one actually reads. The truth is, I’m writing the experience and learnings from an instance that happened lately and it kinda waggled me into some solid realization that perhaps can assist you in your lives.
This article is absolutely gonna be a short read just because I’m unaware of the fact how I’m gonna elaborate as the article continues, though I’m gonna stick to the point so that everyone understands it, unlike my filthy philosophies.
The Cow
Imagine yourself driving a Vintage Chevrolet Corvette down the highway accompanied with some rock music and beer in your hand. Winds blowing, sunlight’s the bedsheet on the plain and your shades are the protectors to your fancy-ass looks. With a gentle speed, you are of course planning to make it that very film as your reality, a herd of cows interrupt your priceless dreams. Damn! You shout, horning at the cows in an effort to resume your dreams into reality. Yup, they are right there blocking the road and you are shouting, screaming, horning, and whatnot. You’re sweating in the heat of summer as if you returned from the pool, and still, there ain’t a percent impact on the cows. They are as impassive and indifferent as the lizard on my ceiling. Simply, they don’t give a shit about what harm they are unconsciously doing. So simply, you give up on that situation. And that’s the most prudent thing you can do — wait and watch them walk away.
Cow Vs Human
The difference between cows and humans is that humans come with emotions, unlike all monolithic cows. The amount of intensity you put in to make the cows move out of your way is just like drinking soup with a folk (I know the example sucks, but you get it), it’s impossible! Whereas, when you try to change a person, if the person is smart enough as my dad says, the person will look up to your thoughts and perceptions and will think about changing or improving. But as humans come with emotions, there exists a bunch of folks who are gonna take your opinions, with which you’re trying to make a reasonable impact in their lives, totally otherwise with subtle pessimistic conclusions.
How to change someone?
Basically, you can’t change someone with the purpose of changing them. When I say changing someone yourself and changing someone by they getting influenced by your thought process and ideologies, is totally contrasting. When you make an effort to change someone, it’s not necessary that they are going to change for sure.
It goes from making an effort to influence them in a way — to they analyzing and interpreting it — to they giving their opinions — to you having a discussion — to they realizing about their shortcomings or maybe the things they need to revise and then finally if they feel that it’s appropriate and that they should change themselves, rather improve themselves, that’s when you hit the goal.
Though this is a very simple example, yet it involves a lot of things. And hence, you can’t really change anyone because, at the end of the day, it’s their own very choice whether to respect your argument and act upon it or not.
The Culmination
At times, when we try to make people realize that it’s essential for them to adopt some kinds of habits, give up some kinds of practices and follow certain paths — they don’t really accept that easily. Now this varies a lot, but I’m talking about the maximum number of people in the society. People who make their judgments based upon their preceding conventional beliefs. So the other day I was trying to convince a person that it’s crucial for her to sleep early and have a good amount of sleep. Stop late-night work and television and perceive exercise as a form of lifetime habit over a small span weight-loss-getting-fit solution. As I said, taking it otherwise is so very easier than regarding it as constructive criticism or just a piece of healthy advice (even if you don’t need one). So when you try to convince people that they are wrong, you are indirectly proving their much-minded preceding conventional believes and practices absolutely wrong. It’s going to break them rather than constructing them.
Maybe you can try to persuade a person twice or thrice, but after that point, it’s actually pointless. It’s pointless to make them discern your perspective even if it makes sense. The people who really want to build themselves into something better every day by learning about their flaws and then analyzing and reconstructing themselves are gonna for sure progress. But people who are monolithic, who are as stubborn as politicians giving up their power, who don’t wanna hear out, should be left giving ideas to after a point of time and a subtle struggle. Because that’s just not in your hand.
Takeaway
This article was just based on an incident, I didn’t really specify that but I’ve expressed my learnings in a way. When I look back to this when I’m older, I’d recollect my journey and it’s important to post this one. The major takeaway from this article is just that -
Maybe you go with a wholesome intention to bring about a healthy change in someone’s life, maybe you try to do good to a person with your own thought process, but at the end of the day, it’s not in your hand to change that person and you shouldn’t even try to at its fullest. You can for sure express your views and arguments, and if the person is wise enough — the change will blossom as a consequence. The person will never change because you made an effort, the person will change because of the persuasion of your ideology.
Think about it…
Thank you friends for reading this article, I’m glad hoping that I’ve given some value addition to your life and you can relate to this. Have a great day, cherish every moment, until next time, peace!
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